One of the biggest no-go area when you’re dating someone new is dwelling on the past. That can mean asking too many questions about your new flame’s previous relationships or
talking at too much length (or at all) about your own. But if you’re
lucky, and you start building a relationship with that someone, there’s
bound to come a point at which you share more information about your
romantic histories. Maybe even some of the most nitty-gritty details and
darkest, deepest emotions come to the surface until there’s no page
But while some couples know everything there is to know about one another’s entire love life timeline, that’s not the case. You are heartminders blog darling and should know this, now you know and I prefer it that way.
That’s right. Despite being together for two years, my friend Daniella
and her boyfriend Olukolade never sat down and talked about ghosts of boyfriends/girlfriends past. She mentioned exes briefly, in passing, in reference to this or that,
and reported that back in college, she coincidentally seriously dated
someone my fiance grew up with. He’s hinted at hookups that happened on
vacations. But nitty-gritty details? Deepest, darkest emotions? Nope. No
thanks. No interest. She will pass.
There’s bound to be more anxiety and self-consciousness surrounding
your past earlier on in your relationship, and that’s definitely
true for me. Back around the time you had only been together for several
months, a year, even two, you definitely did NOT want to know. But as time
has went on, you’ll get more confident about your relationship and, as a
result, a bit bolder, feeling like whatever happened before you was so
long ago. And after all, “I was the one he’d been with for years” you feel me?. “I was the only one his family ever mentioned”– or “had ever met for that matter”.
So I thought, Hmm, there’s no harm with this.
|couple with Actor,Muyiwa Ademola,|
But then … what’s the point? Isn’t the whole idea of beginning a new relationship that you’re moving forward together? You’re in love and grateful to be with someone who’s a better fit than all the rest? What’s the benefit in bringing up anything that came before that?
Granted, if boyfriend has become your fiance, I know you could
swallow talk of the past better than in those earlier, more insecure
days. But at the same time, it’s because you are getting married
that there’s no reason to dig up the past. So, whether you’ve got more
emotional strength for it now or not, I still don’t want to know. NO,
scratch that, he or she don’t need to.
How much do you know about your girlfriend or boyfriend or fiance or fiancee’s past? Are you satisfied knowing what you do (or don’t)?