When we start a new relationship, we have the tendency to believe that it is all about love, companionship, and friendship among other aspects. We enter into new relationships not knowing what to expect, but with certain expectations as to how we will interact with our new partner. However, being aware of certain things such as our partner’s true motives and then acting upon them can result in long-term unconditional love. It’s important to be aware of those things that can become problems in a relationship and even bring about its demise. The following is the top 10 relationship problems and the steps to resolve them.
Problem #1 – Neglect
Neglect can result from a number of things but the most significant causes are addiction, ignoring your partner, and work-aholism. Make time for quality time together and treat your partner like the important person they are.
Problem #2 – Deprivation
Typically, a partner feels deprived when their mate is not affectionate, attentive, caring, expressive, loving, or supportive. Just being there physically is never enough. Try a few small doses of intimacy here and there.
Problem #3 – Infidelity and lying
This can also refer to the acts of dishonesty and betrayal. One way or the other, it will destroy a very critical element of the relationship — TRUST. If these are issues, serious counseling is the recommended course if that relationship is going to last.
Problem #4 – Verbally abusive
Not too many problems are considered as destructive as mental abuse that results from verbally attacking your partner. The abusive partner needs professional help. However, convincing them that this is necessary is another story.
Problem #5 – Making your partner the scapegoat
Another way to describe this is the act of blaming your partner for what has gone wrong with your day, as well as taking out anger and frustration on them. Instead of hurting your partner, attack the real issue head-on and save them the grief.
Problem #6 –
nagging, and nitpicking are all forms of this, as well as just complaining
about everything all the time. No one wants to hear that on a regular basis.
Negativism is like leaky pipes in the wall of your house — by the time you
realize it’s there, a lot of damage has already been done.
Problem #7 –
Back-stabbing and gossiping
except your partner about your issues or blaming your partner behind their
backs is another relationship breaker. Number one, if you don’t have anything
nice to say about someone, shut-up and don’t say anything. Number two, never
say anything to someone else about your partner that you would not say directly
to them in the first place.
Problem #8 –
Controlling and manipulating
This is typically a
sign of co-dependency and can also be called by other terminologies or
descriptive phrases such as attempting to change your partner and make them
into someone they’re not, perfectionism, and possessiveness.
Problem #9 – Always
being in first place
Also referred to as
narcissism and self-centeredness, the easiest way to describe this problem is
with the phrase “it’s all about me.” When your interests become the
center of the universe, you might as well say goodbye to your partner.
Problem #10 –
Always being in last place
This one is equally
as damaging as #9 because you tend to get overrun and taken advantage of. A
person who is a martyr is never happy, especially in a relationship. You have
to factor in your own needs in that relationship, otherwise you are going to be
Help for all these
conditions is available. The problem is recognizing that they exist, getting
the troubled partner to accept responsibility for their actions, and then them
taking steps to correct the issue. Old habits and personality traits do not get
corrected easily, and this is the main reason why professional help is usually
the only avenue for all of the above issues.