My wife is like a V12 engine —Gbemileke Oyinsan

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Both on-air personalities, Gbemileke and Titi Oyinsan have been married
for close to two years. New parents to twin girls, the much-loved couple relive
the pros of being married to each other
 How long have you been married?
Titi: We got married 17
months ago.
 Was it love at first sight?
Oscar: No, it was more of
friendship at first. I was on location working for Showtime Africa at that time
and she was working for Soundcity. She thought I was a guest and for some
reasons, she was fascinated by my shirt. She pulled me over for an interview
only for her to find out that I also came there to work. After that, we began a
good friendship, more professional because we were both in the media. We found
out that we had common interests, goals, aspirations and background.
Titi: This was in 2008 and
he had on a light pink shirt. I felt it was going to look good on camera and I
had not even looked at his face.
 When was the turning point in your
friendship?
Titi: It did not turn. It
just grew, improved and blossomed. We realised that we understood each other to
a great extent. There were so many questions that people would ask about him
and for some reasons, I would just know the answer and it was vice versa for
him.  We ended  up going for events together. I don’t know if there
was a particular time he asked me out, we just found ourselves dating.
 How do you view being in the same industry?
Oscar: Most of the respect
we have for each other stems from the fact that we are in the same industry and
we have a common passion. It is a bonus and bedrock of everything we do. The
love, romance and every other thing are offshoots of that.
 You were once colleagues…
Oscar: We both worked at
Inspiration FM for three years and most people did not know we were dating
until our second year there. Since we presented a show together, we got on air
and did our job. A lot of our colleagues probably thought we were just close or
we knew each other before and there was a strong friendship. It was not until
we both started inviting them to each other’s functions that they started
getting the hint that we were more than just co-hosts on air.
 How were you able to keep it professional?
Titi: First of all, God and
secondly, patience, which is key. I was learning a lot of things from him and a
lot of times, he would scold me for things I did wrong in the studio. He would
give me a lot of instructions and I would rebel against them. However, I was
gaining more from obeying instructions. He knew that he could trust me to be level-headed.
If, for instance, we had an argument in the studio off-air, he trusts me to
continue the show on-air as if all was well.
 Was it difficult deciding who should go and
who should stay on the job?
Oscar: Truth is, as at the
time I left, it was new grounds for management. They had not had that kind of
situation on their hands before; so there was no set rule. They were not
completely against it but as a man, I did not want all my eggs in one basket
and I was working on setting up a media company. There was no way I could do
that with the routine of Inspiration FM.  I was happy and satisfied that
Titi had gotten to a point that she could handle the show we both used to
present. There were a lot of incentives to make me stay but I was at a point
where I knew what I wanted. It was not just about working; it was about setting
a path for my family. I had proposed, we had been engaged for a year and I
needed to think ahead. I had to move out and move on.
 Did you experience opposition?
Oscar: We had a lot of that
from family and friends. Till tomorrow, a lot of people are still sceptical
about the union because in the industry, there have been a lot of divorces. We
are in a world where divorce is the new break-up. My parents have been married
for 40 years, hers have been married for 29 years; we come from a background of
families that have struggled and stayed together and most importantly, have
respect for the institution called marriage. Also, we are Christians, not as a
religion, but in principle.
 When did you decide to propose?
Oscar: Our third year at
Inspiration FM was a major turning point for me. I just thought if I could come
to work with this woman off-air, on–air and I still feel this way, it must
either be I am pretending which means I would pretend for the rest of my life
or I genuinely love her. If you do love at first sight, or all these fancy
things that really look good in movies, once those things go, we are left with
friendship. It is the friendship and the companionship that would matter. Sometimes,
if you find people not enjoying their marriage, they probably got into it for
different reasons. There was no foundation of friendship and a lot of people
are eager to settle down.
 How did you propose?
Oscar: I did not have so
much money and I wanted to keep it simple. There were a lot of expectations as
to who Titi would marry and I did not let it get to me because I knew what I
wanted. Since it was my birthday and we worked the night at a red carpet event,
I got a room at the penthouse of a hotel. We ordered breakfast in the morning
and one of the waiters came with three domes, the first two contained food and
the third, a ring. I went down on my knees and proposed. Of course, it took a
while for us to convince our families.
 Why?
Oscar: Due to the nature of
our jobs
 What are those things you want to change about her?
Oscar: I would not change
anything about her because she brings out the best and the worst in me. She is
very stubborn, which could be a plus if harnessed properly. My wife is like a
V12 engine, which  if you set the engine towards a wall and say ‘ram that
wall’, it is the same energy she would use to ram that wall that she would use
to give you headache if you don’t give her what she wants.  If I had given
up, I would not have been a father to our beautiful twin girls.
Titi: He is good the
way he is. Besides, it is not about changing someone, it is about improving the
other person and redirecting that energy you consider negative. One of the many
things I respect him for, is how he treats others with respect. He honours and believes
in them, no matter how many times I state my doubts about a person. I have
learnt a lot from him.
 Who is the first to apologise when you
quarrel?
Oscar: It is not about who
started the fight, it is about how soon we resolve the issue and make sure that
particular situation does not occur again. I can count the number of times my
father has raised his voice against my mother. One of the reasons why I and my
wife get along so well is that there is a lot of contrast.
 Since becoming parents to your twin girls,
do you still find time for each other?
Oscar: We must give credit
to our mothers-in-law especially, Titi’s mum who has literally been with us
from the beginning. We do find time once in a while and spending some could be
as simple as taking a drive, a walk or seeing a movie.
 Is he romantic?
Titi: According to my mum,
and she tells me this all the time, ‘Leke is so romantic.’ This is because he
could come home with a piece of cake or something pretty in a pink box. There
was an evening he came home with a box of chocolates for my mum. I appreciate
those smaller things than the bigger ones.
 Do you have pet names for each other?
Titi: I call him Leke when
I want to ask for something. I call him Gbemileke when I am exasperated about
something and I call him ‘Baby’ when I am happy. The nickname we have both come
to accept is Baba Ibejiand Mama
Ibeji. It drives us nuts but it’s something to be happy about.

Oscar: I don’t know if it’s
a nickname but I call her, ‘My guy’ when I need something. When I am angry,
it’s her full name, Titilayo.
Source: Punch

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