I’ll be completely real for a minute and admit that I was once guilty of wanting a man that belonged to someone else. In my mind, I was more qualified and more deserving than she to be with this person and the fact that he was “committed” to her (if you’d like to call it that) didn’t stop me from pursuing him. As a married woman now, I cringe at the blatant disrespect I had for that woman and could only imagine how many different ways she probably wanted to kick my ass because had I been in her position I’d want to do the same exact thing.
I see all too often women fighting other women over men that don’t even belong to them. I see side chicks beefing with wives, jumpoffs feuding with girlfriends and so on and so forth. NOW, it’s impossible for a man to “sneak” around because believe it or not, some women are just vengeful and before you realize what you’re doing with this chick, ALL of the details surrounding your secret love affair is no longer a secret.
Thanks to social networking- twitter, Facebook etc the contents of your closet is put on display for the world to see. So with that said men need to be very careful because today, more so than any time before, what’s done in the dark WILL come to light. But that isn’t the point of this blog. This blog is addressing those women, who shamelessly pursue men that don’t belong to them and who no longer have the decency to remain discreet as mistresses of old have done.
Please don’t get me wrong, I don’t think it’s ever okay for a man to cheat on his wife or significant other. But back in the day, long before our time, women who stooped to being the “mistress” didn’t go around bragging about being with a man who was married to someone else. How many times have we heard stories of grandpa having a whole family on the side that no one knew about until decades, and decades later? Back in the day, mistresses knew their role and it used to be a shameful thing to mess with another woman’s man, particularly one that was married.
These days, however, some “women” (term used loosely here) don’t seem to care. They have no regard for the fact that this man is taken and seemingly have no problems “sharing” a man who will never ever belong to them. I don’t care what lies he’s told you, I don’t care how many places he takes you or how many different ways he “gives” it to you- rest assure, if a man wants to be with you…he WILL. If he loves you, there will be nothing that he allows to stand in his way of doing so. Contrary to what some of us girl like to think, a man will be with the woman he wants to be with. You can not continue to entertain excuses as to why you are okay with being a sidechick- whether its- he’ll leave her one day, or he doesn’t really love her- the bottom line is that you’re lying to yourself, you have low self-esteem and you need a reality check!
I know it can be frustrating seeing another woman have what you want but can’t seem to find but merely sleeping with someone else’s man won’t ever make him yours. I’ve seen the antics used by these “other women” as they attempt to break up families and attempt to take the lead but the truth of the matter is that you, being the other, will never win. Wifey will always come first, as long as she is still wifey because remember- you can practically get a divorce at your local walmart if you wanted to these days, it’s that easy. So if dude has a wife (or a girlfriend) it’s because he wants her. If dude is sleeping with you on the side it’s because you’re easy and you’re…there. At the end of the day you never win, even if you are successful in breaking up someone’s relationship and end up with the guy, you will forever have to worry if the same will one day be done to you. The saying goes- if he cheats with you, he’ll cheat on you. So again in the end, you lose.
And of course we know that we can’t place all the blame on the other woman because the man who cheats on his significant other is just as guilty if not guiltier than she… but we’re going to address that one in a different blog.